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Puberty and neurodiverse girls

Puberty is a challenging time for all teenagers, but for a neurodiverse female, the physical, hormonal, and social changes can feel especially overwhelming. These changes can magnify existing neurodivergent traits and introduce new difficulties, often leading to increased anxiety and a feeling of being misunderstood.

Sensory Sensitivities on Overdrive

Hormonal fluctuations during puberty can heighten sensory sensitivities that were already present. A neurodiverse girl might find that new textures like bra straps or menstrual pads are intensely uncomfortable. Smells and sounds, which were previously manageable, might become unbearable. This increased sensory overload can lead to more frequent meltdowns or shutdowns, as her nervous system struggles to cope with the influx of new sensations. The internal changes, such as period cramps or the feeling of a changing body, can be confusing and distressing, as her mind struggles to make sense of what’s happening.

The Social Maze Gets Harder

For many neurodiverse girls, navigating social rules is already like learning a foreign language. Puberty and adolescence make this even more complex. Friendships often become more nuanced, with unspoken social hierarchies and shifting expectations. A neurodiverse girl may struggle to understand new social cues related to dating, popularity, and identity. This can lead to a deeper sense of isolation and a heightened feeling of being “different.”

To cope, many women and girls with neurodivergence become more adept at masking, or camouflaging their traits to fit in. This constant effort is mentally exhausting and can contribute to burnout, anxiety, and depression.

The Perfect Storm of Emotions

Puberty can bring a whirlwind of intense emotions for any teenager. For a neurodiverse girl, whose brain may already struggle with emotional regulation (e.g., in ADHD) or who is prone to anxiety and rigid thinking (e.g., in autism), this can be particularly difficult. The emotional rollercoaster of puberty, combined with social pressures and physical changes, can be a breeding ground for mental health struggles. There’s a higher risk of developing anxiety disorders, depression, and even eating disorders. It’s crucial for parents and caregivers to understand that these behaviors aren’t intentional but are often a sign of a brain in distress.

It’s important to prepare for puberty early by talking openly about body changes, using clear and direct language, and providing sensory-friendly options for period products or clothing. Most importantly, a neurodiverse female needs validation and support to help her navigate this tumultuous period with self-compassion.

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